There’s all kinds of addiction. Drugs, sex, alcohol, gambling,… Hookers crying. Point being there’s tons. This isn’t about how to cope with addiction… Or how to handle it in yourself. This is going to be a story about what it’s like for those that have to deal with an addict.
See, addiction… While it comes in many forms… Essentially is one’s need for something… To cope with life. I think most people have some form of addiction or another. Mild ones are harmless… Others not so much.
Imagine being with the person you love. They make you feel you can’t breathe without them. ….. You adore them and need them. And they love you. And you are happy together. Their touch makes you Tingle…. Their voice makes you warm. Waking up next to them every day is the best part of your existence. Have you had that kind of love? Now …. Imagine … That warmth and trust and happiness…. But sometimes… Every once in a while…. They disappear. You even know what they doing. They fucking someone else’s brains out. They don’t’ care about that person… But… They just…. Lose control of themselves…. And go off and have the same feelings they share with you…. They give to someone else. Make them feel special… Adore them…. Rip the feelings that YOU share together… And they go off and share it alone with someone else. Robbing you. Of their time. Their heart….. Their love. And there’s NOTHING you can do about it. You feel trapped. Scared. Alone. But you love them. And you care about them. You know this other person isn’t really….. Their love. It’s just they can’t help themselves. They addicted. But at any time… You can be left alone. Abandoned… And the magical person you love… Might be gone. Forgotten about you.
Now imagine that…. And when it might happen? Anytime. Randomly. And there’s NOTHING you can do about it. You are at this… Demon’s mercy. You get angry. You scream. You yell. You might even hit. It brings out the worst in you. But if you love someone…. And you struggle with addiction… This is what you putting them through. And the fear that this could repeat… Is constantly looming… Like a cloud. There… Always… Making every day more grey. More bleak.
When addicts get on their… Thing. They check out. They gone. They might be gamblers. Drinkers. Drug users… Etc. whatever it is… While they in it… They zoned out… And gone. You don’t exist. And everything you built… Could be broken.
How to deal with it? I don’t fucking know. I got my own problems. You go figure it out. I’m late. As always.