Fun weekend. I was in LA visiting friends for their graduation. One friend happens to be a girl i dated for a bit many years ago. i had just gotten over my divorce so i was going through some turmoil. Whatever reasons… the end result was I slept with her and then didn’t really do a good job of making plans to see her afterwards. I had always liked her and we got along fine… I just wasn’t quite ready to deal with what she had to offer… which felt a bit overwhelming for me at the time….
So, after a few years and explained confusions we became friends again, and started talking. A few months ago, in a drunken stupor i drunk called her… she told me to stop as it’s not sincere and my apologies mean nothing when drunk. The trick with that is… that they did mean something. it was stuff i wanted to say and apologise a long time ago…. i just haven’t had the emotional push or wave to actually come forth… the 12 shots of vodka seemed to have given me the courage….
so the next day… i said… fuck it. I remember what i said the night before, so i told her… “hell yeah i meant what i said! I’m gonna be a good friend and do right …. “
I missed having her in my life and really liked talking to her… she’s always been respectful, fun and a good friend… so… off i go to support her on her day of graduation along with all her other chums.
Then comes the bomb. we go to a club… she has one shot of tequila… and within a few min… the demons inside her come out. First, she wants to try my glasses on… scratches my lens, then shoves her finger in my eye….. OH YOU DON’T NEED THIS TIE PIN! (I’m wearing a suit … and a tie pin that was a wedding present from my first marriage from an old friend)… she grabs it and THROWS it across the dance floor…never to be seen again… then she starts bumping and grinding on me… got her hands all over my chest and a few grabs of my “danger zone”… i think we are still only one shot down. here comes 2 more shots of tequila…. Now she’s knocking over my drink… spilling a SECOND drink on her friend… throws a shot of vodka on me… then proceeds to high five random people… smacking their hands that are holding drinks… roughly 10 people lose drinks… oh… ? more tequila! 4 or 5 shots down now… LET’S DANCE! wooo!!!! … ugh… great… she drags me out… and starts groping me… if you’ve seen Jungle book… I’m the tree and Baloo is all over me… bumpin/grinding/grabbing/hanging from my tie… yanking my jacket all over the place… after … i think gnawing on my jaw…. she says “You can talk to other girls if you want… i don’t mind… ” … really? You think the space that people made for us and anyone that i look at in the eye avoiding me like the plague is cause
they WANT the guy that was just used as a scratching post?
the last straw? a random chick,walks by.. grabs the silk pocket square from my jacket… and decides it would be sexy to dry the sweat and glitter off her chest…. yeah… my white silk pocket square… that’s for decoration only… and puts it right back. nice. add that to my drink bill…. new pocket square and a vodka…. It’s time for me to leave… Oh… now my friend is crying….
Actually my real issue with all this is not what happened. Heck, it would be a great night if not for one major issue. i’m expected to behave myself… not to be too forward… she keeps her distance and even pulled away once when i tried to kiss her on the cheek (c’mon… i’m european!!! we always kiss on the cheek…. even with guys… well i have on some occasions… but i swear i thought they were girls!) oh… where was i? oh… i have to be composed… and reign it in… but she can just go buck wild? and if this is how people act under the influence… and reign things in during sobriety… how do i know which is the true feeling? how can i trust words, actions… intent?
ah well… what are friends for… if not to molest each other in a drunken haze… at least what goes around comes around… that’s karma. hope we’re square now.